Friday, February 09, 2007
hmn... valentines day, eh.
well i am valentine-less, hee hee.
maybe i will make chocolates for some of my classmates...
ok... speaking of school i had a bad day.
ok ranting, or talking trash is bad, but it is better than to just keep it inside and explode
someday...
and besides writing crappy rants is one of the uses of a blog.
so, here we go.
on gym class, we are playing basketball. we have to count the times of attempts we shoot the ball, and the times the ball went inside the hoop.
when it was my turn to shoot, i sensed that they were making fun of me, the 2 girls,
call them m and n.
so, the second time, my teacher said we have to count again. when i asked how many times...
the did not know, my 2 other good friends were sorry, they forgot, but the 2 did not.
i ignored them a bit, but i cannot take it, i breaked down and cried a bit.
my 2 friends asked my why, and my teacher stopped talking and looked at us, i was nervous,
and tried to stop crying, and said i have a cold. it hurts to be a cry baby... i hate it.
i laughed it off, faked a laugh, faked a smile, hey... if you cant fake it, you cannot survive.
i just realized, you gotta be mean sometimes... well i dont wanna.
i tried to be mean to them, but i thought, i dont wanna be like them, i dont wanna be a jerk.
i dont know why they make fun of me, and some of my classmates.
i have 2 theories... 1. they are jealous of me 2. they look down on me coz of my
countrys background 3. they gotta have to buy a life on ebay 4. they are just plain jerks
who find happiness in making fun of other people. coz they are unhappy, and insecure.
well, not only me, some of my classmates they laugh at, or sometimes our teachers.
i was pretty shocked, to see their true colors, sometimes i think... that it is better
to not know a lot.
well after this, i tried to remind myself not to let people like them ruin my day...
and stop being insecure... man i hate being insecure... guess i cannot avoid it...
it is a teen thing.
but you know what... crying made me feel good. after that i felt so happy, and bubbly... guess i cannot take crying out of my system.
this monday, we do not have classes, it is a holiday.
my sister wants to rent some videos, i want to see the movie a walk to remember and
some classics like grease 2, so maybe i will grant her little wish.
mood - perky